How To Not Respond When A Friend Commits Suicide
Whenever I’m asked why I enjoy being a musician, it is not for the reasons some people think. It would be nice to being recognized for what I’ve done. I don’t do what I do for global fame & recognition either. I also, for damn sure, am not doing it to be an attention whore either. So why Do I do it? I do it because I want to connect and fit in with a community.
Music has this fantastic ability to connect the soul to a moment that no other medium does. I’m honored that I’m talented enough to be part of those musical moments. Those moments which will be remembered by people for a lifetime.
[Tweet “I do it [being a musician] because I want to connect & fit within a community.”]
Suicide on Social Media, Literally.
Yesterday (June 21st 2012) I heard news that an acquaintance took his own life, roughly 6am that morning. Why? Nobody knows. Will we ever? I’ve known Jamie [Duffy] through familiar friend in the WAXTRAX!/TVT music industry circle. He was one of those people who would sporadically come into my life here and there, mostly at gigs I performed in or I was working on for other artists, on WAXTRAX!/TVT. I always had pleasant & brief conversations with him. He was a nice guy and I, like many others, had no idea he was suffering from a severe depression.
The hard part about this news is that he posted on twitter, “this is how the end begins….”. In that tweet was a photo of three bottles of blue sleep aid pills, all emptied on a disposable plastic plate. So after sharing this sad news with someone I know in passing; I got the most arrogant and selfish response I’ve ever heard.
What motivates YOU to be a musician?
According to this “musician” I know, being a musician is all about, “Oh look at me. Give me attention. Me me me me me me me.” I was also told that when a musician kills themselves they only did it because they didn’t have enough attention “payed to them” in life. I mean, for real?
I had to laugh a little, but why did I find this funny? Well, because this rant is coming from someone who claims they’ve decided “…long ago…” they didn’t care to be that arrogant of a person. They surmised they no longer felt the need to be “an attention whore” for being an artist. Which is why they “gave it up.” The irony here is that this person hasn’t given up squat. To this day they will argue, bitch, moan & fight when they have their own little gig. God forbid if anyone talks during THIER performance….
Isn’t that the exact definition of being an “attention whore?”
PS: To those people out there who are going through a rough time and feel like you have no hope left to keep going. Please know you’re not alone. Before you make that decision to “go elsewhere;” please reach out to someone for help. You’re for sure not alone in how you feel.
R.I.P. Jamie